How COVID-19 helped me push through guilt

By Colby Tortorici

I want to preface this article by saying that I understand just how horrible COVID-19 is. It is a terrible virus that has ruined the lives of many. In times like this, however, it does no good to dwell on the negatives whenever possible. Instead, I’ll be focusing on a positive that has come out of this. With that out of the way, let’s get into it.

Hello everyone, welcome back to another edition of Colby’s Corner. The corner has gotten a little empty lately, as, usually, I come up with topics to write about when I’m out and about in my life. As we all know, however, there’s not much out-and-abouting to do lately, as we all sit in quarantine, so I had a bit of trouble thinking of what to write about this week.

As I sat there, pondering topics over a video game, it hit me. I’m playing video games.

Let me go back a little bit. In my normal, non-COVID-19 lifestyle, I spend most of my time going to school and working. If we exclude sleeping, probably a good 70% of my time is spent trying to be as productive as possible. The rest is spent trying to balance … everything else. However, I have a bit of an issue when I’m engaged in that other 30%. I have horrible guilt anytime that I choose to take time for myself. 

I don’t know why this is, I don’t know how to stop feeling like that, but it’s true, I feel awful.

Almost anytime that I’m spending time enjoying myself or relaxing, I feel guilt. I feel like that is time that could be better spent working, rather than, you know, having freedom. It’s something that I always deal with, and it really does suck. However, once the virus hit, things started to change.

I think it’s safe to say that the majority of us have more time on our hands than we did before the virus hit. There’s simply more time in the day when you’re confined to a small set of rooms 24/7, and this has changed my perspective on my time, and how it is spent. I try to get all of my work done before relaxing still, sure. But overall, I’m a lot laxer than I was before.

Considering how awful the world is now, I’ve started to realize it’s okay to breathe, it’s okay to relax, to do things you like. Time is finite, not every single second of it should be spent on being productive. Leave at least a little of it for yourself.

Due to having so much extra time during the COVID-19 crisis, I’ve been able to allocate a lot more of it to free time, and I’m hopeful that this is something that will carry on into the rest of my life, post virus. It’s okay to do what you want when you want!

Of course, this doesn’t mean that work should be ignored. Instead, it should be balanced. Don’t spend all your time relaxing and doing not much of anything, but also don’t spend every second working and trying to be productive. Moderation is key.

Yeah, this is something that I probably should have learned a long time ago, but I’m there now, and that’s a good thing.

The world is … bad right now, so try and find the good in things. It’s hard, sure, but don’t dwell on the negatives.

I managed to transform how I view a huge part of my life during this virus, that has to count for something, right? Hopefully, you can do the same. In the meantime, stay safe everyone.